Job searching is tough and rejection hurts. I feel it too!

The emotional cost of rejection

I’ve been job searching for a while now, and I’ll be honest: it’s exhausting. It is a huge hit to ego and to your mental health. Every rejection email feels personal, no matter how politely it’s worded. Even worse is the silence, when your carefully crafted application disappears into a black hole, leaving you wondering why you weren’t even worth a simple “no”.

Recently, after an interview I thought had gone well, the rejection hit particularly hard. For days afterward, I questioned myself. I wondered if I wasn’t as skilled as I believed or if maybe I’d simply fooled myself all these years. I was so sure I would have done a great job! The truth is: rejection doesn’t just shake your confidence, it makes you question your whole worth.

Changing the way I think about rejection

Slowly, I’ve started changing the way I think about rejection. I’ve realized it doesn’t always mean you’re not good enough. Sometimes it means your resume just didn’t match exactly what an Applicant Tracking System (ATS) was looking for. Other times, someone else might have had slightly different experience or connections.

To give myself a better chance, I’ve learned a couple of practical things. For instance, tailoring your resume to ATS standards helps significantly. I’ve started carefully matching keywords in my resume to job descriptions, not in a forced way, but genuinely highlighting the skills I have that align closely with what they’re seeking. Doing this helped me pass through more automated systems, landing interviews where previously I didn’t even get responses.

The power of reaching out

Another thing I’ve found useful is reaching out to people I know. At first, this felt awkward. I worried about being a burden. But every time I reached out to an old colleague or friend, I was surprised by their willingness to help. Networking doesn’t have to feel transactional or forced. It can just be catching up, sharing honestly about your situation, and asking for their perspective or advice. More than once, this led me directly to new opportunities or at least helped me feel less alone.

I know from experience how easy it is to fall into isolation during a job search, especially when rejection stacks up. But connecting with people, even if only briefly, has reminded me I’m not alone. Most people genuinely want to help. Most people have been exactly where we are right now. A few words from an old colleague can really improve your motivation.

Staying hopeful and taking action

I won’t pretend I have all the answers, because I’m still navigating this myself. I’m still unemployed! But I do know staying hopeful is easier when you focus on small, actionable steps. Improving your resume for ATS, reaching out to your network, or even just giving yourself permission to rest or to have fun when it all becomes too much are meaningful things you can control.

And most importantly, remember you’re not alone in this. I’m right here too, working through the same rejections, holding onto hope. If you’re still applying, still getting up and trying again, you’re already stronger than you probably feel. So let’s keep moving forward together, one application, one conversation at a time. You got this!